Articles about Fear
Abraham, Fear and Choice
Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC
Abraham's life, among others, exhibits the impact of fear on our choices. The reward outlined by the Lord for those who persevere is His increased presence in our lives.
When Children Steal
Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC
There isn't a parent on earth who enjoys the idea of their child stealing. Understanding the possible reasons that children steal is foundational to knowing how to respond in discipline.
What a Lot to Possess
Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC
Our position as a child of God is laden with numerous benefits. Our inheritance is both instant and progressive.
Marital Transitions: Parting the Fearful Waters
Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT
Three steps to finding marital stability in the midst of change
A Christmas Sabbath
Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT
Describes how behaviors and a mindset of peace and rest can bring us closer to God in the Christmas season
Changing Our Christmas Perspectives
Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT
Article uses an analogy from the Old Testament to teach how Christmas can be an opportunity to turn from fear and sin, to the joy, holiness, and wonder of Christ.
Marching On
Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT
Article shows how God can encourage and strengthen us when facing fatigue and discouragement in challenging situations.
God's Peace in the Midst of a Crisis
Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW
Moving account of a young woman who experiences the peace of God in the midst of a personal crisis
Tearing Down the Wall Through Forgiveness
Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW
What forgiveness really is and how relationships can be restored
Personal Purity
Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC
There are benefits to personal purity beyond what we can fully take in as the world is seeming to celebrate impurity. The many faces of sexual impurity is reviewed here. The harmful effects of sexual sin including entertaining impure thoughts are discussed. This piece contains a good discussion of the harm seemingly harmless speech and innuendo brings.
Check List: How Am I Doing?
Questions to ask yourself to find out how you are doing
Is My Husband in Male Menopause?
Daniel Lange, M.S.W., LCSW
Male menopause is similar to menopause in women
Helping the Discouraged
Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT
Discouragement can leave us frightened and unmotivated with feelings of loneliness and hopelessness. Drawing from the biblical story of Elijah and an actual family therapy case, this article discusses five steps to helping an individual recover from discouragement.
My Child Won't Go To School
Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC
School phobia, a severe stress response toward school is a very perplexing condition. Suddenly a child simply will not go to school and becomes unusually forceful in their not wanting to go into the school routine. Unusual crying, sitting down, not moving, screaming, running away from the parent, refusal to leave the car to go into the school, are some of the symptoms in this condition. This article gives a thorough overview of the condition and ideas of what to do with school phobia.
Affliction and Fear
Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC
The healing process for each one of us requires ownership within ourselves of the behaviors and attitudes that often create our own daily battles. What has been discovered is that fear is often behind those patterns of thinking and acting. Scripture tells us that if we are afflicted we are to pray. Knowing what fears we face help us know where to begin in overcoming those core fears.
Ten Ways to "Train Up A Child"
Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC
Parenting is hard. Raising children in today's world is a juggling act for most people when trying to do a good job of applying God’s word."Ten Ways…"gives a real map of behavior for parents to follow as they seek to be a good parent. The admonition to "raise up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it" is fleshed out in this article in practical and moment by moment ways.
Prayers for God's Protection
Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT
Fearful situations can leave us feeling vulnerable. Article outlines a specific format of prayers to use when we need God's protection.
Coping With Holiday Grief
Compiled by Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC
Adapted from "Ten Ways To Cope With Holiday Grief" by L.B. Schultz, this handout provides information that is both practical and helpful for anyone who experiences renewed grief during the holiday seasons. Grief knows no time frame. Because of that fact, knowing what is normal and helpful may aid in alleviating and normalize the grief responses.
Coping with Change at Christmas
Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT
Change is often difficult for families, but changes during the Christmas season can be especially tough. Article looks at four practical and spiritual ways to manage changes: based on Mary, the mother of Jesus, and her response to the birth of our Savior.
Cadence 91: Prayer for Military Families
Sarah L. Pollock (daughter of Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMF
Cadence 91 is a poetic prayer in honor of all military serving in Iraq and Afghanistan. Based on Psalm 91, this prayer poignantly depicts the physical, emotional and spiritual trials of war and how the great love and security of Jesus Christ will not fail.
Fear and Anxiety: Steps to Restoring Courage and Stability
Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT
The new millenium brings added stressors to our lives including ever-present technology, limited family communication and bonding, overwork, and addictions. This article will explore causes and treatment for fear and anxiety to restore a Godly sense of courageious well-being for ourselves and our families.
Twenty Something
Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW
The twenties can be described as a time of great transitions. In this article, Christine outlines common struggles of young adults and provides helpful suggestions for parents and loved ones.
God's Christmas List
Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW
If we find ourselves overwhelmed, anxious, lonely or fearful during this Christmas season, we can take heart and reflect on God’s love. God has made all the necessary preparations for Christmas.
The Excitement and Challenge of Beginning School
Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW
Beginning school can be exciting and challenging for children and parents alike. In this article, Christine Vander Wielen provides parents with helpful guidelines to,, make the transition smoother for themselves and their children.
Everyone is Welcome!
Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW
Schools are working very hard to address the growing problem of bullying through teacher trainings, student education, role playing, parent meetings and having police liaisons. However, the problem has not only persisted but has become more severe and more widespread in recent years. Before bullying can be adequately resolved, the issue of cliques needs to be addressed.
Helping Children with Nightmares
Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW
To children, nightmares are very real and they do not have the knowledge or experience to understand it was just a bad dream. This is a perfect time when parents can be very instrumental in helping their children. This article provides some helpful hints for parents to help comfort their little ones after a nightmare.
Transitions
Linda Hillary M.S., NCC, LPC
A new school year... Returning to school may not be so "carefree."
Anxiety/Fear/Catastrophizing
Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC
We all know the uncomfortable feeling of anxiety. Our hearts race, our fingers sweat, and our breathing gets shallow. Racing thoughts dominate about a perceived threat that we think is too much to handle. Our "fight or flight" response has kicked in. It’s a brain thing. This morning a friend called with an attack of this kind. She calmed when I shared the facts of the condition so I share it here. Our brain protects us by triggering hormones to help us deal with what seems to be danger. Deliberately relaxing muscles can help slow down the ramped up “juices” that flow through the body. Evaluating the racing thoughts will bring reality to the "over the top" worry. Putting a stop to how bad things might get is something our built in “mind manager” can do. All of this and more about anxiety and panic is to be learned at: PFL.org. Type in the words anxiety or panic in the search line. We have hundreds of resources there on this topic from our therapists free for you and your loved ones.
Anxiety Head On
Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC
Anxiety is meant to be a normal reaction to the occasional stressful situation. However, many people experience it excessively and suffer because it has come to be an everyday thing. There are three good habits that can help you if this experience is yours. 1. Ask instead of assume. Some people assume a situation is fearful or become overly responsible because they haven’t enough information. 2. Face the anxiety provoking thing head on. Breathe. Walk it out. Learn that the fear of what it might be like is nearly always exaggerated. 3. Stay in the now. Worrying about how bad it will be tomorrow, next month, or next year keeps your mind and body revved up. Say to yourself: “With God’s help, can I get through this moment, this hour right now?” The answer is yes.
Kids with Fears: Get the Real Deal
Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC
We work a lot with children who have fears. There are many ways to help them through to calm, but the first step is to MAKE SURE YOU UNDERSTAND THE CHILD’S FEAR BEFORE TRYING TO ALLAY IT. Listen carefully to your child as they explain what’s bothering them. Don’t jump to conclusions. We know you have a thousand other things to do in your busy parenting life, but do not assume that saying: “Don’t worry” will help. For kids too young to put words on their fear, it may be helpful for them to draw a picture. One young boy was afraid to spend the night in his grandparent’s home. When he “drew his worry” he drew a scary looking bear. Mom knew exactly the source of the problem. The room where Grandpa kept his antique toy bear collection was where the child slept. Grandma and Grandpa made sure the bears were locked away and explained they “couldn’t get back.”
None of Us is That Far From Crazy
Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC
God is God even in intense inner turmoil. People actually believe crazy thoughts. They believe them for lots of reasons, take your pick; nature, nurture, influence, or drugs. None of us is that far from crazy. Yesterday I sat with a woman who shared thoughts that though seemingly bizarre, had root in experience. The conclusion she made was not healthy, but where the thoughts came from is understandable. How do we sort through those “just true enough” thoughts? We ask God to help us, measure the thoughts against scripture, and act on the shred or more of belief about God’s love for us that we currently have. God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind. Grab that Truth. Hold on. Sanity is near. God is close to the broken and is Jehovah Rapha, the God who heals.
Pity or Empathy?
Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC
Do you have a sick friend or family member? Consider that pity shows a type of hopelessness. It can be a type of “awfulizing.” Empathy genuinely comes along side, shows encouragement, and it does not go to the pit of fear that pity can. So….do you show pity to your friend/loved one, or empathy?
The Difference Between Hurt and Harm
Carrissa Pannuzzo, M.A., LMFT, LPC
Consider this – sometimes love must be tough. True love’s goal isn’t to make the loved one happy; it’s for his or her best. And sometimes the best hurts or incites anger (and anger always comes from hurt, fear, or frustration anyway). Oftentimes people find themselves enabling negative behavior in another because they’re concerned about hurting or angering the person. But there is a difference between hurt and harm. Harm is done for the sole purpose of inflicting pain. Sometimes love hurts, but it never harms. So remove the alcohol from the house. Put on an internet filter. Remove yourself from the relationship. Shut the door. Don’t be afraid to hurt someone you love for fear of their reaction. Don’t take on other people’s problems. Do the loving thing by letting them deal with their own consequences. 1 Corinthians 13:6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
How to Deal with Stress, Bad Habits, and Addictions: Self-Soothing
Carrissa Pannuzzo, M.A., LMFT, LPC
Addiction, bad habits, and unwanted behavior; no matter what you are dealing with in these realms, there is help available in the process of overcoming these things. If you are stuck "in running to your favorite drug," there are ways to neutralize and get unstuck from unhealthy habits and addictions. Self-soothing is the key. This article gives essential skills for overcoming unhealthy habits and addictions.
Positive Impact by Positive Thoughts
Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW
Our thoughts are built by our minds, wills and emotions. Negative thoughts can adversely affect our health if left unchecked. With the Lord's help, our minds can be renewed.
Negative Thoughts to Positive Thoughts
Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW
What happens when we have negative thoughts, and hang on to anger, frustration, disappointment, fear or hurt? According to neuropsychologist ,Dr. Caroline Leaf, each thought we have creates a chemical reaction. When we experience love, joy, happiness, peace and passion, chemicals flood our brain that increases our ability to feel these positive emotions. However, when we experience the negative emotions, an abundance of the same chemicals flood our brain and we become overloaded. With the Lord’s help, we can experience love, joy, happiness, peace and passion.
God is Love
Carrissa Pannuzzo, M.A., LMFT, LPC
1 John 4:18 says, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” So many of us live in perpetual fear of God’s anger or disapproval. And this is exactly what the devil wants. Something God makes abundantly clear in His Word is that God is love and He wants a relationship with us. God’s action and attitude toward us is always redemptive. I love the verses from a song by Pocket Full of Rocks. They say, “He’s not mad at you. He’s not disappointed. His grace is greater still than all of your wrong choices. He is full of mercy. He is ever kind. Hear his invitation. His arms are open wide.” I highly suggest listening to this song and soaking in the reality of how God sees you.
CFH - New Groups Forming for Spring 2015
CFH - NEW GROUPS FORMING FOR SPRING 2015 Title: Putting Fear in Its Place Facilitated by: Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC A 4-week group that focuses on overcoming fears that feed unhealthy behavior. Dates: Tuesdays, March 31 through April 21, 2015, 6-7:30 pm Cost: $15/per person, per week ($60 for 4 weeks) Title: Healthy Relationships & Boundaries Facilitated by: Carrissa Pannuzzo, M.A., LMFT-T, LPC-T. We live in a boundary-breaking world. It's not uncommon to feel taken advantage of or to take advantage of others. Most people can relate to wanting to say "no" but saying yes and then regretting it. And who does have more on their plate than they can handle? Stress, anxiety, and depression are at an all time high. So, how do we know what is our responsibility and what isn't? How can we say "no" and take care of our own needs without feeling guilty? Having healthy boundaries is how! Come to this 8-week class and learn how to take control of your life. Dates: Thursdays, April 9 – May 29, 2015, 6-7:30 Cost: $15.00 per week per person ($120 for 8 weeks) or $100.00 (for all 8 weeks) if paid in full at beginning of group. Title: Cultivate Your Marriage: Couples Intensive Facilitated by: Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW Description: Marriage can be wonderfully fulfilling. Learn ways to cultivate and enhance your marriage. Dates: Thursday, April 30 and May 7, 2015, 6-8 pm Cost: $25/per person, per week ($50/single, $100/couple total for both weeks) Location: Center for Family Healing,1476 Kenwood Dr., Menasha, WI 54952
Games People Play to Avoid Taking Responsibility
Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC
People, because they fear they will lose love or arouse anger if they honestly and directly ask for what they want, often learn to get their needs met by indirect means. Games are dishonest maneuvers designed to get someone to do something by making them feel guilty, fearful, or sorry. Games only work if someone consciously or unconsciously agrees to be the victim and someone the rescuer.
Moving Past Fear, Powerlessness and Trauma: A Neuroscience Perspectiveness
Carrissa Pannuzzo, M.A., LMFT, LPC
Everyone has moments of fear and moments of powerlessness. When combined they create a powerful experience called trauma. With the growing understanding of how our neurological system works, there is more hope for healing now than ever. Help is closer than you think.
Games People Play to Avoid Taking Responsibility
Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC
People, because they fear losing love or arousing anger often learn to get their needs met by indirect means. Games are dishonest maneuvers designed to get someone to do something. Games only work if someone consciously or unconsciously agrees to be the victim and someone the rescuer. Brenda and Sarah discuss five different games people play.
Act on Truth
Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC
Remaining in truth takes courage. It does not matter whether it is financial, spiritual, emotional, relational or physical truth. If you have given in to fear, shame, hiding, or shame about how you are not truthful, you have given your control away. When we tolerate and believe the lies of these emotions, we become brothers to destruction. I believe each of you reading this do not wish to be a brother or sister to destroying your life. Diligence in pursuing truth is tough work. However, you are not alone. Hold steady! You are reclaiming your God-given gift of personal control.
A Rock Through Your Front Window
Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW
Have you ever felt as if someone threw a rock through the front window of your life? Maybe, it was after a divorce, sudden job loss, serious accident, grave medical diagnosis, death of a loved one, or broken relationship. It may have felt as if your life and dreams were shattered to pieces and you were left to grieve the loss amidst the shards. Although we cannot control all the circumstances in our lives, we can control how we respond. Do we allow disappointment, fear, anger, and bitterness to take root in our heart? Or...Do we allow ourselves the freedom and space to grieve? Do we allow ourselves the freedom to change and grow?
The Stories We Tell
Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., LCSW
Children are wonderfully creative at thinking up stories, in which they are heroic and triumphant. However, when difficulties arise we can lose the ability to tell ourselves a good story with a positive ending.
Rebuilding Trust
Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC
Trust is precious. Once lost trust becomes priceless. Brenda outlines 4 steps to practice that may help rebuild trust but, more importantly, help us live with a greater sense of peace within.
Money Troubles?
Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC
Are you in a relationship where you argue about money? Though some studies show it’s a huge relational problem, arguments concerning money aren’t really about money. Money in relationship settings is symbolic of safety and power. It is important for loved ones to explore what money means to each of them in light of their personal history. How much something costs is not the problem. How safe and how influential (give and take) people are with each other is a good measure of successful money management. Money trust is a measure. It goes hand in hand with relational trust. If you have a relationship where you have worked this through, you know what I mean.
