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Dear Rosa,

I grew up in a family that seriously tore apart anyone or anything that the "top dogs" didn't understand or like. It was all done in fun, like it was joking. It seems to me that this was done to the ones who were older, and then they began doing this to the younger ones. I am convinced they don't even know they continue to do this now even though we are all grown with children of our own. I have found myself "taking apart" those who seem to be against me at times. If not out loud, often in my thoughts. It is sort of like second nature to me. I want God to help me with this. I see it sometimes in my own children.

- Discouraged

Dear Discouraged;

You have identified a serious problem. You have also "owned" your part in it. 1 John 1:9 comes to mind as I think of how others have dealt with mocking. In this passage of scripture, "...if you confess your sins, He is faithful and just to forgive your sins and cleanse you from all unrighteousness," the Lord is telling us about a here and now forgiveness as well as a process of forgiveness. The type of sin that is "ingrained," for whatever reason, needs attention and confession over and over. You will find that the mocking becomes defeated as you set your mind to invite Jesus into the process of restructuring your responses when you feel threatened, angry, jealous, or unsure with someone. When you start "inviting Jesus in" to the habit of mocking, you may find that you "go there" two times a week, for example. In six months you may find that you "go there" (to the mocking) only two times a month. What I am describing is the process part of getting rid of sin. There is nothing new under the sun. Mocking produces real anger because it IS real anger.

- Rosa

For a biblical reference, read about Sanballot mocking Nehemiah. Nehemiah 4:1-4.

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