Articles

Conflict and the Call to Bless

Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

The desire for revenge is within each one of us in the face of hurtful or offensive behavior. It is our way of saying we are not the villains. God has called us to bless one a nother. Blessing one another requires a cessation of treating others as if they are always the villains. In doing so, we open the door to receiving God's intended blessing towards us.

Why Giving is Better Than Receiving

Whitney Stager, M.S.

Learning how to give without expectation will help to strengthen and revitalize your relationship with others and with God.

Marriage Relationships: Strengthening the Bond thru God's Love

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

A couple's journey from blaming each other to helping each other

Marital Transitions: Parting the Fearful Waters

Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT

Three steps to finding marital stability in the midst of change

Attributes of a Successful Marriage

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

This article lists 15 keys to a successful marriage, including the habit of forgiveness, letting go of mocking and contempt when under duress, and rehearsing the good rather than the “bad” about the other.

Marital Disloyalty

Suzan Myhre, M.S.S.W., LICSW, LPC

This article addresses the process of how marital disloyalty begins or continues.

Suggestions For Clarity In Relationships

Author Unknown, Edited by Brenda Spina, M.S.,LMFT, LPC

This handout provides a list of specific response one can use when behavior in relationship becomes intrusive or offensive.

One of the Worst Things Parents Do: Putting the Marriage Last

Suzan Myhre, M.S.S.W., LICSW, LPC

This article explores the drawbacks of "putting the marriage last" in the list of family priorities.

Can This Marriage Be Saved?

Ginny Schroeder

Working through difficulties in marriage is possible

Martha and Phil

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Martha and Phil are like many couples who feel confused as to why their relationship is not better than it is. Read on as you discover some core shifts in behavior and thought that will help increase their ability to relate intimately and honestly.

Moving From Shame To Respect

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Moving away from a sense of shame to self respect is very important to our mental and even physical health. Shame means to operate out of a "down deep" sense of not being good enough or that something is very wrong with us. This article gives great guidelines for healthy ways that combat a shame based way of living.

Lack of Progress in Counseling

A "Dear Rosa" question and answer regarding concern about receiving help, the resistance involved and setting goals.

Trauma Happens To Competent Healthy People

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Trauma causes a reaction in people. That reaction is physical because the brain is signaling the body to do something. This is true with natural disasters like floods and tornadoes as well as fighting or past trauma in relationships. What this feels like and how this affects a marital relationship is discussed in this article as well as the beginnings of what to do.

Using Mindfulness to Keep Relationships Healthy

Whitney Stager, M.S.

Insights and tips are provided on how use mindfulness to be attentive to others feelings, as well as your own, in everyday experiences, to help strengthen your relationship.

Respect in Families

Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

There are three foundational principles that make respect in families happen. Following these principles may be challenging but are also an expression of our commitment to following the examples laid before us by the Lord. In part one, respect is defined and a brief look at grandiosity is taken.

Validation is Not Agreement

Suzan Myhre, M.S.S.W., LICSW, LPC

This article describes the difference between validating another person's communication and agreeing with it. Examples are given.

Different Culture, Equal Honor: Viewpoints on Shame

Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT

Family and individual rituals can look different, but are equally valued by God. Article shows how to bring sensitivity and honor to these rituals, when culture or economic and social status are different between people.

Answering Jesus' Call

Whitney Stager, M.S.

This article helps the reader make decisions about when it is important to act on Jesus' call and to be open to His timing.

Broadcasts

Marriage - Agreements, Wants and Changes #568

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

The marital relationship has a way of challenging every aspect of our personhood. This programs discusses how to discuss the challenges of changing or accepting the differences between two people.

Expressing Feelings #569

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

One of the challenges of any relationship is knowing how to express what it is we think and feel. Discussed in this program is the "how to's" of putting our feelings and wants into words.

Expressing Appreciation #571

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Who doesn't like to be appreciated? This program presents ways to properly express appreciation in a relationship.

Double Binds: Loving and Being Alone #613

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Loving, togetherness and being alone. Discussion focuses on double binds in the marital relationship.

Family Life of Jacob: Background of His Marriages #622

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Dynamics explored around the marriage of Jacob to wives Leah and Rachel

Family Life of Jacob: Rachel & Her Dependence on Jacob #623

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Describing the relationship between Jacob and Rachel practical applications are made for our life today.

Couples Styles, Part 1 of 4 #670

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Couples are bonded to one another in different ways. The different styles couples have and how they are bonded is discussed.

Couples Styles: Cycle of Anger, Part 2 of 4 #671

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Discussed is the cycle of anger and what the couple can do about surfacing conflict.

Couples Styles: Attributes of Positive Functional Couples, Part 3 of 4, #672

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Outlined in the program are guidelines for what promotes a well functioning relationship in marriage

Couple Styles: Attributes of Successful Marriage, Part 4 of 4, #673

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

This program discusses the necessity of conflict in successful marriages as well as outlines other attributes to look for.

Why Men Pull Away #1 of 4, #2295

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

The age old discussion of gender differences rises once again. Communication needs differ between the genders and thus we have times when one wants to talk and one does not. Discussed are the possible triggers that are touched in men.

Why Men Pull Away #2 of 4, #2296

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

The age old discussion of gender differences arises once again. The differences in needs regarding communication is discussed along with possible factors that trigger men pulling away from women.

Why Women Crash & Men Get Frustrated #1 of 3, #2299

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Ever come to the end of your "emotional rope"? Discussed here are some of the ongoing dynamics that take place when women continue to be physically and emotionally overwhelmed.

Why Men Pull Away #3 of 4, #2297

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

The age old discussion of gender differences rises once again. Discussed are the differences in needs for communication and possible triggers that cause men to pull away.

Why Men Pull Away #4 of 4, #2298

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

The age old discussion of gender differences rises once again. Lynda and Paul wrap up the series discussing possible triggers as to why men pull away from women.

Why Women Crash & Men Get Frustrated #2 of 3, #2300

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Ever get to the end of your "emotional rope"? Discussed here are some of the dynamics of what happens when women continue to be physically and emotionally overwhelmed.

Why Women Crash & Men Get Frustrated #3 of 4, #2301

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Ever get to the end of your "emotional rope"? Discussed here are some of the dynamics that happen when women continue to be physically and emotionally overwhelmed.

Wives Who Lift Up Their Husbands #3092

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Lynda discusses the impact of wives who speak of their husbands strengths.

If You Really Loved Me #3 of 3, #3163

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

In this three part series, Lynda Savage covers the impossible logic that lies beneath couples' thinking. In these programs the confusion that follows this thinking is unraveled.

Affairs #1 of 2, #3127

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Lynda, using an example she has written, discusses the factors that contribute to an affair.

Affairs #2 of 2, #3128

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Lynda presents and discusses the steps towards an affair and the steps out of an affair toward reconciliation.

Closeness and Distance in Marriage #1 of 3, #3249

Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Closeness and distance in the marital relationship is one of the fundamental tasks of the couple. These programs normalize the fluctuations of desire for closeness, discuss the quickness of the judgement toward one another, and lays out some steps for the journey back towards one another.

Closeness and Distance in Marriage #2 of 3, #3250

Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Closeness and distance in the marital relationship is one of the fundamental tasks of the couple. These programs normalize the fluctuations of desire for closeness, discuss the quickness of judgement toward one another, and lay out some steps for the journey back towards one another.

Closeness and Distance in Marriage #3 of 3, #3251

Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Closeness and distance in the marital relationship is one of the fundamental tasks of the couple. These programs normalize the fluctuations of desire for closeness, discuss the quickness of judgement toward one another, and lay out some steps for the journey back towards one another.

If You Really Loved Me #1 of 3, #3161

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

This three part series Lynda Savage covers the impossible logic that lies beneath couples' thinking. In these programs the confusion that follows this thinking is unraveled.

If You Really Loved Me #2 of 3, #3162

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

In this three part series, Lynda Savage covers the impossible logic that lies beneath couples' thinking. In these programs the confusion that follows this thinking is unraveled.