Practical Family Living

Anger, The "A" Word

Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Anger is a word that creates great discomfort for many people. However, there are many reasons why anger can be a positive contribution to any relationships

Confrontation

Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Confrontation is a difficult behavior to master yet crucial in our ability to build a sense of equality and respect in relationships. There are specific steps in preparing to confront that one can follow that help in creating the best possible outcome.

Deprivation and Anger

Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Feelings of anger often cover many different primary emotions: hurt, confusion, fear, and rejection. Deprivation, often based in fear, is a part of life. Placing our confidence in the Lord's availability may not reduce deprivation but can help increase our ability to be comforted.

Learning to Fight Fair

Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

All of us have times when we disagree or fight and fight dirty. There are helpful guidelines to fighting fair. They may be ideal but these guidelines promote the best possible atmosphere for you and for your loved ones.

What's Behind That Anger?

Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Anger is a complex emotion and uncomfortable for many. Since anger is often a secondary emotion, one is benefited by identifying the primary emotion anger covers. Along with this are the possible thoughts and demands that feed the anger.

Why Giving is Better Than Receiving

Learning how to give without expectation will help to strengthen and revitalize your relationship with others and with God.

Parenting Perspectives on Behavior and Bonding

Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT

A child's oppostional behavior may indicate emotional pain. Article explores larger perspectives, including need for bonding and healing.

Easter Clothes: Throwing Off Cloaks of Unforgiveness

Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT

Forgiveness brings emotional and spiritual healing. Using Biblical references to Palm Sunday and Easter, and a story from Corrie Ten Boom, this article shows how the old "clothes" or habits around unforgiveness hamper our freedom and joy.

Family Systems and Generational Bondage

Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT

Article describes how past generational patterns can influence current family functioning, and how God can equip us in healthy family functioning.

Marching On

Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT

Article shows how God can encourage and strengthen us when facing fatigue and discouragement in challenging situations.

God's Forgiveness

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

God's forgiveness is complete. He moves us from shame and guilt to being set free.

Escaping the Role of Scapegoat

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

A vignette portraying a family scapegoat moving from cooperating with the role to rejecting the role

How to Stop Bullying

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

Helpful suggestions and step by step plan to end bullying

For Shame, For Shame: How to End Shaming When Disciplining

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

The power and influence of parents is great; keeping the parent-child relationship in its proper place

Overcoming the Role of Family Hero

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

A vignette portraying common characteristics of the family hero

God's Presence in the Midst of Suffering

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

Moving account of experiencing God's presence in the midst of horrendous suffering

God's Peace in the Midst of a Crisis

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

Moving account of a young woman who experiences the peace of God in the midst of a personal crisis

Tearing Down the Wall Through Forgiveness

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

What forgiveness really is and how relationships can be restored

Blame A Block to Healing

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Life hurts sometimes. With the hurt we can look for a person to blame. When we project blame toward others we are really saying they are responsible for our failures. If others are responsible for our failures, do they then get credit for our success? Find ways in this article to combat the temptation to blame.

Acute Stress

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Acute stress is the initial concentrated exposure to a traumatic event or events. Acute stressors might be a war, being robbed, experiencing excessive cruelty, a natural disaster, viewing human mutilation, etc. What happens to our bodies in acute stress is that the unexpected events put the body in a type of strain. After being exposed to trauma, the sense of feeling safe is hard to regain.

Marital Disloyalty

Suzan Myhre, M.S.S.W., LICSW, LPC

This article addresses the process of how marital disloyalty begins or continues.

Clearly Wrong: Bad Behavior and What To Do About It

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

How do we reside in the place of love when we fail in our behavior with others. There are times when each of us engages in bad behavior: Behavior we do not find acceptable to God or ourselves. What do we do when we are wrong in our behavior? This article provides answers; a "how to" in moving from bad behavior to a better "place," a forgiven place, a place of reconciliation with God and ourselves.

The Third Step in the Reconciliation Process

Suzan Myhre, M.S.S.W., LICSW, LPC

This article describes the five steps in the process of reconciliation and focuses in detail on the third step.

A Story of Getting Honest

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Being honest with yourself is the first step and straightest line to mental and spiritual health. This is a story about someone struggling with what the “supposed to” form of living produces, and applies to anyone who hides difficult feelings from themselves.

Using Mindfulness to Keep Relationships Healthy

Insights and tips are provided on how use mindfulness to be attentive to others feelings, as well as your own, in everyday experiences, to help strengthen your relationship.

Coping With Holiday Grief

Compiled by Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Adapted from "Ten Ways To Cope With Holiday Grief" by L.B. Schultz, this handout provides information that is both practical and helpful for anyone who experiences renewed grief during the holiday seasons. Grief knows no time frame. Because of that fact, knowing what is normal and helpful may aid in alleviating and normalize the grief responses.

Christmas and Family Attachment

Lynda Savage, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Some children find attachment difficult. Adopted children may have an especially hard time attaching to parents and siblings. Christmas is a time when small steps may be taken to promote a sense of belonging and attachment. A description of this situation is provided here along with ideas to begin to promote attachment in families at Christmas time.

Facing the Holidays Together

Brenda Spina, M.S., LMFT, LPC

Each year numerous couples and families struggle to keep pace with the expectations placed upon them from various sources. Keeping extended family, friends, and each other happy requires great skill around negotiation, self-awareness, and the provision of flexibility. This article outlines several guidelines to be aware of as the festivities are rushing in to eat up your time and energy.

Blended Families and Teens

Mary Lambrecht, M.S. LMFT

Blended families can be challenging for everyone, especially a teenager. Article describes these challenges and ways to help your teen navigate the ups and downs.

Working Hard To Be Liked

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

People pleasers work very hard to be liked and crave love and acceptance from others at the cost of their own identity. The real person can become lost in the daze of perceived expectations. But there is good news.

Suicide Prevention: Making the Connection

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

Suicide is a very complex subject and is usually not about death at all but rather about wanting to stop the pain. The vast majority of the time, those who are thinking about suicide do give verbal and/ or behavioral warning signs particularly in the last week before the attempt. By knowing the warning signs, loved ones can intervene and provide support. This article lists many verbal and behavioral warning signs of suicide and provides questions to ask if you suspect a loved one may be suicidal.

Moms' To Do List

Christine Vander Wielen, M.S.W., CAPSW

Moms are good at taking care of their loved ones but often do not take time for themselves. This article offers encouragement to moms to care for their needs and discusses ways moms can be proactive by nurturing their minds, bodies and spirits.